Naked Truth

> A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he
takes
> off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde
walks
> by, and the man immediately gets an erection.
>
> The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Sir, did you
> call for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must
> be new here, let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection
it
> implies you called for me." Smiling she leads him to the side of the
> swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily
> lets him have his way with her.
>
> The man continued to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna
> and as he sat down he farted. Within a few minutes a huge, horrible
> corpulent, hairy man lumbers out of the steam toward him. "Did you call
for
> me?" says the hairy man. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You
> must be new here," says the hairy man, "it is a rule here that if you fart
> it implies that you called for me." The huge man easily spins him around,
> bends him over a bench and has his way with him.
>
> The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by
the
> smiling, naked receptionist. "May I help you?" she says. The man yells,
> "Here is my membership card, you can
> take the key back, and you can keep the $500 membership fee." "But sir,"
she
> replies, "you've only been here for a few hours, you haven't even had the
> chance to see all our facilities."
>
> The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 61 years old, I get a hard on once a
> month, but I fart 15 times a day. No thanks!"